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Martini:
Arguably
the most popular cocktail of all time, and certainly the favorite
of myriad characters in novels and motion pictures, the martini
is stunning simplicity - gin or vodka and dry vermouth. There
are numerous stories of its orgin, the most popular being that
it's a descendant of the MARTINEZ, which is, in turn, an offspring
of the MANHATTAN. Over the years, that early four-componet Martinez
recipe has metamorphosed into a two-ingrediet, much drier Martini.
At the turn of the century, when popular usage of the word "Martini"
took hold, the drink's proporations were equal parts gin and dry
vermouth. By about 1915, the ratio was two part gin to one part
vermouth, with four-to-one being the norm by World War II. Today
it's not uncommon to see ratios of 15 to 1. Bottomline, the less
the vermouth the drier. Made properly, a classic Martini can take
your breath away with it's icy fire, while simultaneously soothing
the stress of the most savage day. Inquire about our very unique
Martini packages so you to will experience the taste of enjoyment.
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ARIES:
Drinking style: Impulsive Aries people like to party and
sometimes don't
know when to call it a night. Their competitive streak makes
them prone to closing time shot contests. They're sloppy, fun
drunks, and they get mighty flirty after a couple tipples. Getting
Aries people drunk is a good way to get what you want out of
them,should other methods fail. Aries can become bellicose when
blotto, but they will assume that whatever happened should be
forgiven (if not forgotten) by sunrise. They can be counted
on to do the same for you -- so long as you haven't gone and
done anything really horrible to them last night, you sneaky
Gemini.
TAURUS: Drinking style: Taurus prefers
to drink at a leisurely pace, aiming for a mellow glow rather
than a full on zonk. Since a truly intoxicated
Taurus is a one-person stampede, the kind of bull-in-a-china-shop
inebriate who spills red wine on white carpets and tells fart
jokes to employers, the preference for wining and dining (or
Bud and buddies) to body shots and barfing is quite fortunate
for the rest of us. This is not to say that the Bull is by any
means a teetotaler -- god,
no. A squiffy Taurus will get, er, gregarious (full of loudmouth
soup, some would say) and is extremely amusing to drag to a
karaoke bar when
intoxicated.
GEMINI: Drinking style: Gemini's
can drink without changing their behavior much -- they're so
naturally chatty and short-attention-spanned that it's just
hard to tell sometimes. They can amaze you by conversing with
finesse and allusions, then doing something to belie an extremely
advanced state of intoxication, like puking in your shoe. Gemini's
possess the magic ability to flirt successfully (and uninfuriatingly,
which is very tricky) with several people at once. They like
to order different cocktails every round -- repetition is boring
-- and may create a theme (like yellow drinks: beer, sauvignon
blanc and limoncello) for their own amusement.
CANCER: Drinking style: Cancer is
a comfort drinker -- and an extra wine with dinner or an after-work
beer or six can be extra comforting, can't it, Cancer darling?
Like fellow water signs Scorpio and Pisces, Crabs must guard
against lushery. Cancers are brilliant at ferreting out secret
parties and insinuating themselves on VIP lists -- and, in true
Hollywood style, Cancers are never really drunk; instead, they
get "tired and emotional" (read: weepy when lubricated).
But there's nothing better than swapping stories (and
spit) over a few bottles of inky red wine with your favorite
Cancer. Even your second-favorite Cancer will do. The sign also
rules the flavor vanilla, and you'd be adored if you served
up vanilla vodka and soda
LEO: Drinking style: Leo likes to
drink and dance -- they're often fabulous dancers, and usually
pretty good drinkers as well, losing their commanding dignity
and turning kittenish. Of course, they're quite aware they're
darling -- Leos will be Leos, after all. They generally know
their limit, probably because they loathe losing self-control.
When they get over-refreshed, expect flirting to ensue -- and
perhaps not with the one that brought them. But Leo's not the
type to break rules even when drunk, so just try to ignore it
(try harder, Cancer) and expect a sheepish (and hung
over) Lion to make it up to you the next day.
VIRGO: Drinking style: Cerebral Virgos
are compelled to impose order onto their bender. Their famously
fussy quest for purity could lead to drinking less than other
signs, sure -- but it could also lead to drinking booze neat,
to sucking down organic wine or just to brand loyalty. They
rarely get fully shellacked -- but, oh, when they do! Virgo's
controlled by the intellect, but there's an unbridled beast
lurking within, and they let it loose when walloped. It's dead
sexy (and surprisingly unsloppy). As one Virgo friend used to
declare, "I'm going to drink myself into a low level of
intelligence tonight." A toast to the subgenius IQ!
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LIBRA:
Drinking style: "I'm jusht a social drinker,"
slurs Libra, "it's jusht that I'm so damn social?" Libra
loves nothing more than to party, mingle and relate to everyone.
Whether dipped in favor of Good Libra (with Insta-Friend device
set to "on") or heavier on the Evil Libra side (they
are little instigators when bored), the Scales can really work
a room. Charming as they are, Libras are notoriously lacking in
self-control, however, which can get them into all sorts of trouble
-- including wearing their wobbly boots waaaay too early in the
evening, flirting with their best friend's beau or even blacking
out the night's events entirely. Oops!
SCORPIO: Drinking style: Don't ever
tell Scorpios they've had enough, for they'll smirk at you and
quietly but intentionally keep tippling till they're hog whimpering
drunk, out of 100-proof spite. Scorpios like to drink, and screw
you if you have a problem with that. Most of them see the sauce
as something to savor in itself, and not as a personality-altering
tool -- though if depressed, self-loathing Scorps seek total obliteration.
But generally, they're fascinating drinking pals, brilliant conversationalists
and dizzying flirts. They also remember everything -- especially
what you did when you were blitzed. Only drink with a Scorpio
who likes you.
SAGITTARIUS: Drinking style: In vino
veritas -- and, for Sagittarius, in booze blurtiness: When buttered,
they'll spill all your secrets and many of their own. Tactlessness
aside, Sagittarius is just plain fun to drink with. This is a
sign of serious partying (what else would you expect from the
sign of Sinatra, Keith Richards, the Bush twins and Anna Nicole
Smith?). They're the people who chat up everyone in the room,
then persuade the entire crowd to travel somewhere else -- like
a nightclub, or a playground, or Cancun. Good-natured hijinks
are sure to ensue (including a high possibility of
loopy groping; spontaneous Sag is a brilliant booty call).
CAPRICORN: Drinking style: Capricorn
is usually described as practical, steadfast, money-hungry and
status-thirsty -- no wonder they get left off the astrological
cocktail-party list. But this is the sign of David Bowie and Annie
Lennox, not to mention Elvis. Capricorn is the true rock star:
independent, powerful and seriously charismatic, not too eager
to please. And if they make money being themselves, who are you
to quibble? But just like most rock stars, they're either totally
on or totally off, and they generally need a little social lubricant
to loosen up and enjoy the after party, especially if they can
hook up with a cute groupie.
AQUARIUS: Drinking style: Aquarius and
drinking don't go together that well (except for water, that is).
They have an innate tendency toward know-it-allism, and if they
get an idea while sizzled, they're more stubborn than a stain
or a stone. If they're throwing a party or organizing an outing,
however, they're too preoccupied with their duties to get combative
-- and they make perfectly charming drunks in that case. Fortunately,
they're usually capital drink-nursers. They also make the best-designated
drivers (if you can get them before they start raising their wrist):
Aquarius is fascinated by drunken people and capable of holding
interesting conversations with soused strangers while sober.
PISCES: Drinking style: If you're a
Pisces, you've probably already heard that you share a sign --
and an addictive personality -- with Liz Taylor, Liza Minelli
and Kurt Cobain. Not only do Pisces like to lose themselves in
the dreamy, out-there feeling that only hooch can give, but they
build up a mighty tolerance fast. Who needs an expensive date
like that? On the other hand, they're fabulously enchanting partners,
whether in conversation or in crime. With the right Pisces, you
can start out sharing a pitcher of margaritas and wind up in bed
together for days.The phrase "addictive personality"
can be read two ways, you know. |
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